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Because All Content Deserves To Go Viral.
Illustration for article titled Damage Control: Mike Pence Has Said That, No Matter The Outcome Of The Election, He And Trump Will Continue Making Women’s Lives Hell

Donald Trump came under major fire during last night’s final presidential debate after admitting that he might not accept the results of this election if he isn’t declared the winner. But now, his running mate is speaking out to set the record straight: Governor Mike Pence has clarified that, no matter the outcome of this election, he and Trump will continue to make women’s lives complete and utter hell.

Here we go again: Pence cleaning up Trump’s messes.

It’s unprecedented for an American presidential candidate to claim that an election has been rigged against him, but Pence took time today on the campaign trail to assure the public that, regardless of who wins this race, he and Trump will remain 100 percent committed to destroying the lives of women everywhere, from actively opposing abortion rights all the way down to basing the value of women primarily on their looks. While the VP nominee has occasionally diverged from Trump throughout their campaign, Pence was confident that, if handed a loss, he and Trump would absolutely continue to work together on their mission to vilify and oppress women all across the country by any means possible.


“Look, everyone knows that Donald likes to speak off the cuff,” Pence told a reporter from CNN. “We will absolutely respect the outcome of this race, and if we lose it, we will work harder than ever to pass harmful, oppressive legislation that denies women their autonomy, cuts off their access to proper health care, and generally shames our mothers, wives, and daughters into obedience. That’s a promise.”

When asked if Trump would concede the race on Election Day if he lost, Pence waved his hand dismissively.

“He will respect the will of the people,” he said. “If Donald needs to concede, he will do it, and then we will both embark on a lifelong journey to spread the same damaging and violently misogynistic rhetoric that made our campaign possible from the beginning. Even if we lose, we will remain more committed to our mission of terrorizing women at their foundational level than ever. Our message will never die.”

Wow. Mike Pence is obviously doing damage control here by debunking Trump’s comments about a rigged election and easing the minds of anyone concerned that he and Trump will ever let up on their complete assault on the idea that women are equals who don’t need men to tell them what’s best for them. But with less than three weeks until Election Day, it just might be too little, too late for the Trump/Pence ticket.


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