When 21-year-old Adam Harris announced that he was gay to his Alpha Delta Phi brothers at the University of Alabama, he had no idea how they would react. Would they reject him? Would they continue to embrace him in their close community of friendship and trust?
Adam loved his life in the fraternity and didn’t want anything to change, but he understood that if he didn’t want to be treated differently, he needed to prove to his brothers that, despite his sexual orientation, he was still the same loud, cocky asswipe they’d known all along.
“I told them right off the bat that just because I’m a homosexual doesn’t mean I can’t be the same jackass as I was before,” said Adam, who maintains he still wears the same Oakley sunglasses and croakies he wore back when he was still in the closet. “I’m still going to treat those I’m attracted to like disposable sexual objects, I’m still going to leave my empty protein shake cups festering in the sink for weeks on end, and I’m still going to show up to costume parties in blackface.”
“Yes, I’m gay, but that doesn’t mean I won’t pick fights with people who accidentally bump into me at bars or shout belligerently offensive things at strangers on the street,” he continued. “If anything, it’s kind of cool that I have more license than ever to casually throw the word ‘faggot’ around in conversation.”
Initially, some of his Alpha Delta Phi brothers were uncomfortable with Adam’s confession. Their concerns, however, were unfounded, as six months after coming out as openly gay, Adam is still committed to being the same incessantly deplorable shitstain he’s always been.
“When he first told everyone that he liked slobbing knob, a few of us—me, Gavin, Tanner, Schwartzy—were worried he might start acting like a pussy, but he’s actually been pretty chill,” said Brody Henley, one of Adam’s fraternity brothers. “It’s like, okay, his number-one slampiece might be a dude, but at least he’s getting some anal, you know?”
From Adam courageously embracing his sexual identity to the tolerant, supportive response from his fraternity brothers, everything about this story is inspiring. Be sure to share this with the gay assholes in your life!
