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This is a truly massive miscalculation. When Peoria, IL resident Chris Gabel invited his new friend Jeff Caldwell over for dinner with the family, Jeff was happy to oblige. But while introducing Jeff to his kids, Chris came out of nowhere and told his kids to call him “Uncle Jeff”—even though they’ve only been friends for two weeks.

What is that about? Jeff hasn’t even talked to this guy more than four times, tops. Now all of a sudden he’s been fast-tracked to uncle? This is not the way this is supposed to work.


Chris met Jeff at a poker night that a mutual friend of theirs holds once a month, and the two hit it off over a shared interest in country music from the ’60s and ’70s in a brief interaction that in no way warrants Chris telling his kids to call Jeff “Uncle Jeff” a mere TWO WEEKS LATER. For god’s sake, he literally just met these kids. What, is he supposed to buy them birthday presents now? He can barely even remember their names. One of them is Ethan. The small one is either Elena or Alana, but whatever her name is, she’s calling him “Uncle Jeff” like she’s known him all her life.

It’s just unsettling.

Plus, Jeff’s not even sure he’s going to stay friends with Chris. Sure, they bonded over an affinity for ’60s pedal-steel guitars, but he hardly knows the guy. Now he’s suddenly dubbed “uncle” to his children two weeks into their friendship? This just does not feel right. This is far too soon.

It’s got to be strange for the kids, too. They’re pretty young, so they kind of just rolled with it, but they’ve got to think it’s pretty bizarre that their dad just brought home a guy they’ve never seen before and all of a sudden they’re supposed to call him their uncle. That’s got to be off-putting as hell. You’ve also got to wonder what Chris’ wife thinks about this “Uncle Jeff” business. Honestly, she seems pretty unfazed, which, to be frank, is insane. Does her husband bring home a new uncle for the kids on a regular basis or something? Why isn’t she acting like it’s totally bonkers to bring home a guy you barely know and make your kids call him uncle?

One night, Jeff’s hitting it off with a guy over Gram Parsons’ music. Two weeks later, he’s “Uncle Jeff” to his kids. Wow. The family seems nice and all, but dang, this guy really should’ve waited a little bit longer before rocketing Jeff straight to uncle status so soon into the friendship, because this is weird as hell.


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