The Inventory

Because All Content Deserves To Go Viral.

3/20/18

10:49 AM

Must See3/20/18

Must See3/20/18

Unbelievably Rare: This Is The First Vernal Equinox To Fall On The Blu-Ray And DVD Release Date Of ‘Jumanji: Welcome To The Jungle’

3/19/18

3:59 PM

Privacy Win! Facebook Is Adding A ‘Protect My Data’ Button That Does Nothing But Feels Good To Press

3/16/18

2:44 PM

Environmentalism FTW: NASCAR Is Cutting Down On Emissions By Replacing All The Race Cars With A Single Bus That Drivers Share

3/16/18

1:09 PM

Heartwarming: When This Restaurant Saw A Lonely Old Man Eating Across From A Photo Of His Dead Wife, They Gave Him A Way-Hotter Photo Of Carmen Electra

3/16/18

11:49 AM

End Of An Era: The Yakuza Has Announced That It is Switching From Committing Crimes To Babysitting

3/15/18

4:03 PM

Genetic Mystery: Spending A Year In Space Has Left Astronaut Scott Kelly With A Much Funnier Way Of Saying ‘Check, Please!’ Than His Identical Twin Brother

3/14/18

3:25 PM

Doing His Part: To Support The High School Students Walking Out Today, Logan Paul Has Postponed His Epic School-Shooter Prank

3/13/18

2:33 PM

Must See3/13/18

Must See3/13/18

Heartbreaking: Rex Tillerson Has Spent The Morning Boxing Up All The Oil In His State Department Office

3/13/18

11:37 AM

Someone’s Getting Fired! Some Hapless Bozo At This Opioid Company Accidentally Implemented A Business Model That Incentivizes Profit Over Public Safety

3/13/18

11:35 AM

Absolutely Beautiful: Last Night Beyoncé Performed A Moving Duet Of ‘Crazy In Love’ With A Hologram Of John Candy

3/12/18

11:21 AM

Breaking The Cycle Of Addiction: Heineken Has Unveiled New Bottles With Extra-Long Necks To Give Alcoholics Time To Think About All The People They’re Letting Down

3/9/18

12:33 PM

Playing Cupid: Barron Trump Tricked Donald Trump And Stormy Daniels Into Showing Up To The Same Romantic Dinner In Hopes They Get Back Together

3/9/18

12:05 PM

Reform At Last: After The Parkland Shooting This Florida Gun Store Changed Its Sign From “GUNS! GUNS! GUNS!” To “Guns. Guns. Guns.”

3/8/18

5:28 PM

Incredible Discovery: Scientists Are 99% Certain That The Bones They Found On A Pacific Island Belonged To Either Amelia Earhart Or Jesus Christ

3/8/18

11:43 AM

Unlocking The Past: Ancestry.com Now Tells You Which Of Your Ancestors Were So Hot It Would’ve Been Pretty Hard To Resist Committing Incest With Them

3/8/18

11:14 AM

Public Health Win! Purdue Pharma Has Released A New Type Of Oxycontin To Help Ease The Pain Of Losing A Loved One To Oxycontin

3/7/18

4:36 PM

Absolutely Beautiful: When These 8th-Graders Found Out Their Teacher Had Eczema, They Raised The $200,000 Stud Fee For His Dog To Have Sex With Legendary Racehorse American Pharoah

3/7/18

11:47 AM

Tough But Fair: This Teacher Confiscated A School Shooter’s AR-15 For The Rest Of The Day

3/5/18

5:39 PM

Taking Him Under His Wing: After The Oscars Ceremony Last Night, Daniel Day-Lewis Pulled Timothée Chalamet Aside And Counted To 1,000

3/5/18

2:02 PM

Missed Our Oscars Live-Tweet Last Night? Here Are 15 Tweets That Sum The Night Up Perfectly

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